From the desk of: RUPERT (Volume 1: Chapter 1; Page 1)

I Guess I've been at Pleasant Valley Pet Clinic for about 4 weeks now. I think I fit in. I am positive the owner and the staff love me. I know I've found a permanent home. I am officially a "Clinic Cat". What does it mean to be a clinic cat? This is what I have observed thus far:

• I am expected to entertain the owner- Hah! This has been tooooo easy. You see, Karen Jackett, DVM LOVES cats. She will probably turn out to be one of those old cat ladies you hear about, surrounded by 100 cats. Wait, no....thats a hoarder. Scratch that-she will have several cats, maybe 6. But she will forever have a 

  

  What stolen pen?
   

  cat in her lap in her old age. Anyway, she is a breeze. I have come to love her, as she just has a way with cats. Thats important to us felines. I love to steal the pens off her desk. It makes her giggle. I love the sound of her laugh.

• I am Expected to stay indoors- Epic fail! Last week I snuck out the side door. I ran around the parking lot while Amy chased me. At one point, she had me in her grasp but I scratched her and made her fall down. Hehehehe. Occassionally, I have an evil streak. I hide it well...by acting scared. Sometimes the humans don't know the difference. But alas, the side door has not been cracked since then, without me being put into my cage. Becky calls it prison. I learned my lesson about cars up at Ice House road, where they found me. I think I can handle our parking lot. The humans disagree.

• I am expected to act interested by the fax machine and the printer-Humans are so easily entertained. I throw them a bone at least once a day by acting like I am hunting the paper that comes out of those machines. They think its adorable! What about ME is not adorable???

• I am expected to stay clear of the dog patients- My opinion is "Why can't we all just get along?" You find out fast, living in an animal hospital, that that is not always true. Did you know that some dogs don't like cats? How offensive! I found out that this rule is for my own safety. Little do they know that I could probably make quick work of some of those dogs. That was the other thing I found out: Patients come first. Also, some of the cat patients that come in are sick, or carry viruses. I am to stay away from them, too-So I don't become "exposed" or whatever. I am vaccinated, though-so I know they want the best for me. I also tested negative for all those nasty cat things before I became a hopsital cat-that means the cat patients are safe as well! I enjoy seeing all the critters that come through our place.

• I am expected to be sweet to the clients: I've discovered that most people who walk through our doors love animals. That is so cool! All I get are compliments....all day long! It is easy to be nice to people with all this adoration. I think that eventually I could be what they call a "comfort cat". Comforting people who need comfort. That would be a great job!

I am sure there are other rules, and I will learn them as we go along. I found out that their last hospital cat "Bonkers" lived here for like 10 years. I heard that he occassionally broke the rules, so I am going to try to do better. There was this guy named "Spur" that lived here for a few years. They talk about him like he was puuuurfect, so I am going to try to follow his example.